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#300 - weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
08/19/02 @ 4:13 pm

you don't live for me
but you live with me
you don't see me
but you see every day
you don't ever hear
a single word i say


oh, you ask alot of questions
but you don't wait for any answers
you like me alot
but you don't know what i like
oh you like the way i look
but you don't know the color of my eyes


and i don't care what you do
but i care how you do it
i don't care what you say
but i care how you say it
i don't care if you love me
but i care
i care how you prove it


oh for ten times the money
i'll take what you make me
and over 10 times the roses
i'll take the wildflowers you picked for me
over someone else's song, yes
i'll take your little whispers in the dark
oh your little whispers in the dark


and i don't care what you do
but i care how you do it
i don't care what you say
but i care how you say it
and i don't care if you love me
but i care
i care how you prove it
prove it, prove it
oh ya gotta prove it


and i don't care what you do
but i care how you do it
i don't care what you say
but i care how you say it
and i don't care if you love me
but i care
i care how you prove it


i don't care if you're sorry
unless you mean it
and i don't care if you're angry
unless I can hear you screaming
and I don't care if you're with me
unless i know that you feel it
feel it, feel it
ya, you gotta feel it


oh, and i don't care what you do
but i care how you do it
i don't care what you say
but i care how you say it
and i don't care if you love me
but i care
i care how you prove it


and i don't care what you do
but i care how you do it
i don't care what you say
but i care how you say it
and i don't care if you love me
but i care
i care how you prove it


it's not what you do by Ellen Reed

We caught the end of Ellen Reed's set at Redmond Town Center Sunday. It's an outdoor mall. She was the opening act for a band playing a mall. Kinda sad for her, but we're thrilled, because she has the MOST amazing voice. I sat down and just listened & relaxed as I waited for Husband to use the bathroom. When he came back, I didn't want to leave to go do what we'd come to do. We compared her voice to Natalie Merchant, her style to the Indigo Girls, and her song-writing skills to Sarah McLachlan. It was just her and her accoustic guitar. She sang this amazing song about how "the dog won't eat, and he won't sleep, it's been five days since you've been gone, and I know just how he feels..." When I told husband about it, he smiled like he thought it was cute, because we like cute little references to dogs or cats (The Presidents of The USA: "Kitty" comes to mind). I told him no, it was just a very bitter sweet love song.

Anyway, we went up to her and bought her CD. She was so happy to talk to us! She had a beautiful smile, the cutest freckles, and her hazel eyes were just shining. I was in such awe at how approachable such beauty could be. Husband and I talked about how amazing it is that there are people out there who can just open their mouths and sound so glorious, when so many famous acts go on tour and sound either bad or at least not as good as on their CDs. She was in that first, glorious category. I've listened to the CD 5 times now. That dog song isn't on it though. :(

Do you know how hard it is to be at work today? I have soooo much I want to be doing at home. Heather doesn't have my work address, so I'm trying not to become a nervous wreck as I wait as patiently as possible to get home to see if she responded to the email I sent her this weekend. In one way, I feel like being completely reserved. On the other hand, I want to tell her EVERYTHING in one great gush. That would probably take at least 24 hours straight, but I could try!!!

AJ & I chatted about it this weekend, about how I'm kinda freaked about revealing that I'm bi, because I'm scared she'll see right through me and know I've fantasized about her! eek! AJ was sweet & understanding. She said not to think about it, to wait awhile before bringing it up. My response was something like: "Yah, like in another 10 years!" I guess I'm still just nervous about coming out to people, and all the people I've come out to who are female, I immediately tell them, "oh, but I'm not interested in *you*, so don't worry about *that*..." And I kind of can't really say that this time...

Although, I've always been attracted to JP, so I wonder how I did that? I can't remember coming out to her... I pretty much just remember her always knowing... That is, once she moved back to Seattle while we were all in college... Huh. I'll have to think about this.

Anyway, I talked to AJ on Friday. Didn't really get a chance to talk with her later that weekend. AJ is so great. I was feeling nervous, finding Heather RIGHT after I discovered what a great friend AJ is! AJ didn't seem to feel akward at all, which made me feel better. We talked & talked & talked, about nothing, mostly. And about storms. She was worried about tornadoes while I was sitting there dozing off next to the keyboard! How bizarre is that? It's very weird to think that she's not right down the street or something.

We've already talked about changing that though. She's thinking about moving, and despite my threats that Seattle is NOT the place to move to in this economy, it's now her favorite pick over, get this: Austin, TX & Myrtle Beach, SC. Holy Shit: where did Myrtle Beach come from??? Anyway, I am thrilled that she is as excited about getting a new friend as I am! It would be amazing to have a best friend in the city! :) Husband thought I was joking when I said we were talking about becoming neighbors. He's so cute! :)

What else am I excited about? Well, there's always LAS VEGAS!!! Woo-hoo!!!!!!! I kind of asked Heather if she wanted to meet up here or in Portland during Labor Day weekend, but she didn't respond over the weekend, so Sweetie & I went ahead and booked our vacation. Weeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! 3 nights & 4 days in Vegas! Yippie! Only after the fact did I grown internally & give my self a smack on the forehead: I'm trying really hard not to spend money, and that plan goes RIGHT out the window when we vacation in places like LV. I mean, how are you NOT supposed to spend money in the gambling capital of the world???? *sigh* Whatever. Mmmm-mmmmmm! Buffets, here we come!!!!!! :)



Went to see "Triple X", that Vin Diesel movie, on Saturday. Oh, FUCK, does he have a hot body. Tattooes all over in this film. And there are a few scenes where he doesn't have a shirt on, AND his pants are riding VERY low, and you can see some tattoo disappearing down around his hips and groin area into sweet oblivion. HOLY FUCKING GOD I want to fuck that man!!! That said, you probably won't like this movie very much. It was pretty bad. It's not even that it was bad. It's that the stunts were WAY over the top. Everyone thought the first one was way cool, and they sounded very appreciative. Later, they were laughing out loud at the preposterousness of it all. I admit, the motorcycle + explosion scene was pretty far-fetched, but even I found the snowboarding scene ridiculous. And the whole theater let it be known that they agreed, laughing almost non-stop. I *hate* audiences like that. Anyway, the chick was kinda hot, as were the car scenes, and no one walked out, so I think that any men that haven't seen it yet will probably appreciate it enough not to regret spending money to see it. If it's a $2 matinee!

So wanna know the best part of this weekend? My husband's cock. We finally got sick of waiting around for my damn monthly CURSE to bug off, so we went at it. I was feeling a little bolder than usual, and actually asked for a few things for once. Like ice on my nipples. And my clit. Ice is fucking amazing if it's done right. And then he made me cum using only his fingers. My man is fucking amazing. And then he fucked me, and that was fucking amazing too. His cock is perfect. He is perfect. I wouldn't trade it or him or our sex life for ANYTHING.

Happy #300 guys. Thanks for sticking with me!!!

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