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#251 - New Year
01/04/02 @ 6:45 pm

Once again, I've let too much time pass between posts. Life just gets in the way. Ok, maybe I'm just lazy...

Really, it's my new crack habit, I think. I found a new way to entertain myself at Neopets, and I've been spending most of my time there for some odd reason. Nobody ever said I was smart...

So what's up with my life? My husband has been a poop head. I visited my nieces. I went back to work. Did some housecleaning. In general just whiled away the time unproductively.

Yes, even my perfect husband can be annoying. Annoying & frustrating as hell even. Let's just say that when we drove back to his parent's house for New Year's Eve, I was in a horribly cranky mood from lack of sleep, and once we arrived, everything he did seemed geared towards setting me off.

Not to mention that there were 2 dogs in the house incessantly barking. And 2 little nieces constantly wanting attention. I think that I'm better with them in a public setting. Something about being confined in the house with no escape or something leaves me wishing a never-before-seen door would open up and spirit me away to a new section of the house no one knows about.

We saw Lord of The Rings again, after much convincing of the girls that they would like it. And they did. They are no longer merely Harry Potter clones, but true Sci Fi buffs now! And when they were opening their Christmas presents, I mentioned to their father & my sister-in-law that I was slowly indoctrinating them into the Hello Kitty part of the world with little trinkets, as I tried to lure them from the whole Disney-fixation. I was told that they were already there, and they both loved Hello Kitty. Opening the door to many new things I can get them in the future! And here I thought I was all evil, working for the dark side, but they were already here! hehe

Not that I have anything against Harry Potter or Disney, I just think you need to have multiple obsessions to stay healthy. Did I really say that out loud?

Anyway, here we are in a new year. It got me to thinking, realizing that when I went back to work, just what a new year means.

It means it's been a year since I've gone dancing, so that's what we're doing next weekend to celebrate my birthday.

It means that our anniversary is only 3 months away! 11 years together, 4 married. Wow.

It means I met R. about 9 months ago. He emailed me a Christmas greeting while I was out of town. I was totally not expecting that. I emailed him back thank you, & I hoped he had a nice time too. And now I'm checking my email inbox all over again to see if he'll write back. What the hell is wrong with me? Who knows.

It means that I've been at Diaryland for just about as long. OK, May, so like 7-8 months, but still. It's been a long time! I have over 250 entries. And Christ if I don't have close to 25k in hits! Holy shit!

Diaryland is the 2nd most important thing to happen to me in 2001. Honest. I came here looking for a place to shout about my emotions, the rip-your-guts-out kind. And I found an audience, believe it or not. And I found friends too. And ran into people that I thought were friends, but the second I called them that, they turned tail & ran. Yes, I am bitter about some of this. But I still love Diaryland.

Because after discovering people were reading my diary, things quickly turned to experimenting with my writing & my sexuality, as I tried to prove to myself that no matter how crazy I was, people could accept me & even like me for it. That was an amazing experience. I haven't felt so confident in myself since... god, high school when I won scholarships. All this time, I've told myself I'm a writer, but never done much about it. It's been nice to get some response in that department.

Lately, I've fallen back into not writing. To many distractions with life & the internet. But I'm still trying to update, if only to make this a standard diary, to record what goes on in my life. I used to keep a diary when I was a girl, but Boot Camp Fucker screwed that up. So it's kind of nice to just document things. Of course, I still love to bask in the glow of all the adoration you guys throw at me, so every once in a while you might see something juicier than usual. Who knows?

Anyway, of course the most important thing about this year has been my husband and our marriage. Despite being a poop head over New Years, he is an all-around great guy. I love him immensely. And I wish he'd come home so we can get some dinner!

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