bursting surprise

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#141 - cozy coyote
2001-08-21 @ 7:55 p.m.

memories work in strange ways. i was walking to the photocopier, removing a post-it from the page, sticking it to my wrist so i would remember to re-stick it after i had made my copies. this somehow triggered memories of grade school. a particular gradeschool. (i moved around *alot* as a young girl).

something about the fact that it's raining like it's fall outside, & putting something on my wrist makes me feel all girlie. my elementary school in hawaii was open, so you'd walk outside to get to various classrooms & the library, etc. this grade school was one big building. the carpets made the sounds muted, like a quiet church. but the laughter & excitement of being a kid off to recess or lunch: it was still noisy. i always felt very cozy & safe in that building. and all my memories associated with that building seem to be in the fall or winter. being inside & watching the rain & lightning outside, or outside at recess in your thick jacket to protect you from the winter chill. it wasn't the kids or the teachers or the experiences that felt cozy. it was the building.

i feel all cozy right now. :)

i hate coffee. really. a coffee-hater living in Seattle, what greater hell can I ask for? ;) I take it all in stride though. I think I hate coffee because I don't like anything that tastes bitter. Ever since coming to this conclusion, I've been trying to think of anything bitter that I enjoy, and I just can't come up with anything. So the theory stays for now. However, running a close second for reasons to hate coffee is the smell. We are coffee snobs here in the office, usually running to Starbucks when we're out. However, the coffee smell wafting from the kitchen usually smells like shit. Literally. It smells somewhat like feces. Yes, I really do hate coffee. Oddly enough, today it smells slightly like tuna fish. I'm hungry. I now want a tuna fish sandwich. How fucking odd. Have I also mentioned I hate fish??? Yes, I live in a coastal town, was born & raised mostly in Hawaii, and I hate fish. But I occassionally like a tuna fish sandwich. As long as mom didn't put pickles or relish in it. BARF. Yes, I'm a strange one. And you can bite my ass, you weirdo coffee-addicts.

in case you haven't noticed, i'm a movie & book addict. i love the written word. i love a good story. i love interesting characters. i love cinematography. sometimes, those things add up to me being a film snob. only sometimes though. i like my art films, my indie films, my foreign films. but in general you sit me down in front of a period drama or romantic comedy, and i will be enraptured for the next 1.5 - 2.5 hours. regardless of the quality. usually.

i saw "coyote ugly" last night. i blame it on sir heimer. he had said that he got off on the combo of hot chicks in the film, and his wife giving him some sexual attention. i had ideas of duplicating that scenario. i just couldn't get into it. i realized that although the regular coyotes were pretty fucking hot, the chick this movie was about was *way* too young for me to get into. she didn't look a day over 18. i was all excited to lust over accented australian boy. until i noticed that he was indeed a BOY. ick. i thought i was gonna be sick when they finally did their thing, but she was wearing a thong, which made it much more adult. thank god. so, other than that chick being too young, what else? oh yah, the film SUCKED. duh. I just wasn't expecting it to suck that bad. oh well.

now, sometimes I can be a book snob, but not usually. coz pretty much the only things I enjoy reading are sci-fi. or not-quite-trashy romance novels. then there's my whole vampires (read: sexy) + sex = orgasm in a binding. so while I may be somewhat of a snob in that the story has to be enjoyable and the writing needs to be somewhat more than "the lazy dog jumped over the log", I kind of keep my reading habits to myself, because people look at you funny when they think you're a sci-fi nut.

so i'm currently re-reading "Beggars in Spain" finally. I can't believe I've let it go this long without re-reading it. I actually don't know what happens next! amazing! granted, I remember most of the big plot twists, but not what brings them on, etc. You'd think I'd have this thing memorized by heart or something. I don't go around re-reading all my books, just the ones I love. Like Imajica. Or The Vampire Lestat. Or the Laurell Hamilton books.

Which brings me to my stupidity. I meant to reread the Anita series this summer, because the next installment comes out in early October. Well, it's nearly the end of August, and I finally pick up a book to read, and it's "Beggars". *sigh* I am the slowest reader ever, and I have 9 Anita books to read by October. I don't think I'm gonna make it! We'll have to see. I only started "Beggars" friday, and already I'm almost 3/4 of the way through. Then again, I was up until all hours Friday night... Wish me luck!

for as long as i can remember, i have had dreams that my husband is a jerk. i don't know why. maybe my subconscious is having trouble dealing with the fact that he is walking perfection, and needs to make up stuff about him? who knows. 2 nights ago, I dreamed that he was following me in a separate car as we headed to some destination in Bremerton. for some reason, i look in my rear-view mirror, and I see him turning down the wrong road. so I quickly turn in the same direction, hoping to catch him. i don't catch him. i end up meeting him at a grocery store. where he's pissed at me. and i'm pissed at him. i'm so upset, i walk out with my groceries without paying for them. someone says, "excuse me..." when i open my car door, & i look over & it's some store employee, kindly reminding me to pay for my groceries. so i go back in, have another run-in with my husband, throw my hands up in a huff, abandon my groceries, and leave. don't even ask me what the fuck this dream was about.

last night i dreamed very strange dreams. something about a war. a weird sci-fi war that i can barely remember. later, our space ship went to this space-port we thought was empty, but inside were 2 androids that were thousands of years old, abandoned by their makers. they didn't quite grasp the fact that they were robots. but they were really nice. we were trying to track down what happened to their people, and were in the middle of making arrangements to take them to a nice place to call home that wouldn't leave them so lonely. yep, damn weird.

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