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#326 - unsexy summer ahead
06.18.03 @ 9:29 am

Yes, it was an ambitious idea. And I meant it at the time. But right now, I don't know when the next time will come that I'll want to write about sex, let alone have sex. Not for most of the summer, or so it looks from here. Why? Here are my favorite (har-har) reasons:

#3. Dreams: So I now have a recurring dream/nightmare that comes up more often than my dreams about revisiting Hawaii: a need to find a bathroom. I either a) can't find a bathroom and have to go in some weird place, or b) find a room filled with toilets with no privacy between them. My favorite theme (not) is a locker room filled with toilets that are all occupied, despite there being no privacy anywhere. At some point, when I finally find a free toilet, I must weigh my need to pee against my need to pee in privacy. When I started having these dreams years ago, I wondered if it meant I would wake up some morning and be all wet from having an accident in bed. It's never happened. But the dreams concern my waking self enough, that in the dreams I have started referring to other such dreams in my head, ie: "this time real life is just like a dream, and I have to choose between one of these disgusting toilets in full view of everyone?! Eww!!!" Imagine my surprise when I wake up and realize it *was* just a dream.

And when I'm not dreaming about needing to find a toilet, I'm dreaming of my cat. Stupid asshole cat getting me emotionally tied in knots of guilt!

#2. Work: I came back to work Monday and all hell had broken loose. There were a million things to do since I was gone the Thursday and Friday before, plus a bunch of the front reception area staff weren't in that day, so I got to cover reception. Oh, and that person formerly known as Galpal decided for some reason to once again hold a personal grudge against me. I don't know what her problem is. Like my personal life keeping me from work is a personal vendetta against her. Whatever. I can't deal with bullshit like that.

#3. Nieces: I've mentioned this at least a million times I believe, but we're watching our nieces this week and the week after the 4th of July, then after that we're just watching the elder when her little sister flies back home. I have new-found respect for Gwen and Proofrok. How the fuck do they ever find the energy, let alone the inclination, to have sex??? Our first day with them was Monday, and after working later than usual because of the afore-mentioned CRAP going on there, I came home and made the three of us dinner (husband refuses to break his diet to share family meals with us). After dinner, I was exhausted, but forced myself to spend a little time with the girls anyway. By 8:30pm, I was begging my husband to take over so I could go to bed. When I woke up yesterday feeling almost as if I hadn't slept at all, I was afraid our Tuesday would be ruined, since we had plans to go to the water park.

Luckily, once I got to work, I felt much more awake. But I left on time so it didn't completely drain me. However, when we got to the water park after driving for AN HOUR, they were getting ready to close, because I had foolishly assumed that all such places close at dusk. Why the fuck would a place that can make so much money in 90 degree weather close when the sun is still shining and it's still hotter than a mother fucker??? Who knows? But I walked across the park going very fast in bad shoes, so that I might activate our Season Passes, and blistered the bottoms of both feet.

I was limping around the house last night. I was not a happy girl.

And this morning I wake up with sore feet and caked-on unused sun block, dreams of lame cats behind me, and a day of annoying working conditions in front of me, and I'm wondering when I'm ever going to have sex again. Because I can't remember a time I've ever felt more unattractive in my life.

Yah. Sex diary. Ya-huh. WHATever. *sigh*

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